I understand that the following morning [after the party], Ms Heard (or possibly one of her friends) defecated in our shared bed… On 12 May 2016, Ms Heard confessed to our estate manager, Kevin Murphy, that leaving the feces in the bed had been ‘just a harmless prank,’ thereby effectively acknowledging that she had been responsible, whereas she had previously sought to blame our dogs.
That’s from Johnny Depp’s written statement, shared in court during his libel case against the British tabloid, ‘The Sun’—which published a story accusing Depp of domestic violence. Depp also noted that the blameless dogs are tiny Yorkshire teacup terriers, which are too small to jump up on the high bed “and besides, their poo would have been a lot smaller.” We offer it as a reminder for all of us—single or hitched—to count our poop-free blessings. Illustration: Parth Savla
the big story
An ‘Only in UP’ Crime Story
The TLDR: The first attempt to arrest Vikas Dubey—a very big badman from Kanpur—went disastrously wrong, ending in the death of eight policemen. The six-day manhunt ended in his arrest, which was surprisingly (and suspiciously) uneventful… until Dubey was shot dead on his way back to Uttar Pradesh. We take a closer look at a story that would put ‘Paatal Lok’ to shame.
Tell me about this Dubey...
Dubey’s criminal career spans 30 years and 62 cases—of which five are of murder and eight of attempted murder.
Sixty of these cases have been filed in a single police station: Chaubeypur in Kanpur.
He has been charged with killing his former school principal, a cable operator and—most infamously—a BJP minister of state in 2001.
Dubey and his men entered a police station and shot Santosh Shukla—in the presence of 25 policemen!
All the police witnesses turned hostile, as did Shukla's own security men. Dubey was acquitted in 2005.
Point to note: Killing a prominent politician did wonders for Dubey’s political connections.
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